There are moments in your life that you will never forget.
Giving birth to your first child is one of them. It is a beautiful moment that
takes your breath away. This is our story.
Note: Our birth story is quite a blur and I am using our text exchanges
and phone records with our doula and midwives to write this.
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| Me two days before delivery |
Paul and I had plans for a natural birth. No drugs, no
interventions; just us, our doula, and the midwives that we had grown to trust
and get to know over the 39 weeks of our pregnancy. Though my goal was to go
completely natural, I was open to an epidural if need be as I had no idea if I
could handle it. I wanted to be open minded to anything while still preparing
my body and mind to labor naturally.
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| Our first family photo |
To prepare, Paul and I took a natural birthing class. Over
our seven week course, we felt well informed and prepared for what was to come
our way. We learned how to have a healthy pregnancy, signs of labor, and how to
prepare both mentally and physically for labor.
We also hired doulas to help coach both Paul and I during labor. We toured
the hospital that I was to deliver in, packed (and repacked) our hospital bags,
and took every step to be confident in
ourselves and believe that together, we could handle labor. Little did we know
what was to come..
On January 30th, Paul and I went for our 39 week
checkup. After showing zero signs of impending labor the week prior, we were
ecstatic to find out that I was 2cm dilated, 80% effaced, and 0 station. Lots
of progress had been made over the week, but we knew that we still had a ways
to go. During the exam, our midwife also raved about my “beautiful pelvis.” I
had no idea what that meant, laughed, and took it as the strangest compliment I
had ever received.
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| Cutting the cord |
The following two days, I continued life as usual, walking
2-3 miles a day, cleaning, and working full time. I wasn’t slowing down, and
like many late stage pregnant women, felt that our baby would never come.
On Saturday, February 2nd, I woke up after an uninterrupted
9 hours of sleep. I had been a little crampy the night before and still
remained so, but knew that this was completely normal this late in the game.
After a nice, long, hot shower, lazing around in the morning, and getting dressed,
Paul and I decided that we should grab some lunch and do thrift shopping on
what we knew was to be one of our last weekends sans baby.
We arrived at Panera at about 12:30 and ordered our lunch. I
started to notice that my cramps were becoming more frequent, but still they
were nothing to write home about. We gave our doulas a quick text letting them
know I was having some cramping and they told us to get back to them if we
found they were in a regular pattern.
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| Gwen's first bath |
After lunch, we headed to a thrift shop to look for a
hallway mirror. It was here that my contractions became a little stronger, but
still were nothing major. I wanted to go home and take a bath. We arrived home
at about 1:45. My cramps were still in no apparent pattern but were a little
stronger and lasting a little bit longer. I soaked in the bath tub and found
some relief; I also worked through some stretches and exercises that we learned
in class. At this point, it was 2:27pm, and while I was still a bit
uncomfortable, I knew that, if in labor at all, it was still too early to go to
the hospital.
For the next hour and a half or so, I continued stretching,
walking around our house, and soaking in the tub. My gut told me that this may
be the real thing as my contractions were gradually getting stronger. Still, I
was able to speak through all of them (even speaking to my doula on the phone
at 3:45) got the dogs ready to go to
boarding, and tell Paul what he could do to make me comfortable. I was excited
that this could be the real thing and that I could possibly meet our sweet girl
in the next day or so.
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| Loving my girl |
By 4:19pm, I was in the bathtub full time; my contractions
seemed to be closer and were definitely getting a bit more intense. I was
practicing our different poses, doing breathing techniques, and trying to keep
my body relaxed- all things we had learned in class. Paul was amazing at
coaching me, meeting my needs, and helping me relax.
Somewhere around 4:35pm, I began to feel something change.
Out of nowhere, my contractions became unbearable, and I felt a strange
pressure that had not previously been there. Though I had never been in labor, I
knew I had to push. I told Paul this and he said that I just needed to relax
and that there was no way I had to push. I wasn’t showing any signs of being
that far into labor. I felt different and, for the first time, scared. I wanted
to go to the hospital. I also had convinced myself that if I was still in early
labor (which after laboring only two hours or so I must be), there was no way I
could do it without an epidural.
At 4:46 pm, Paul called our midwife, told them I wanted to
head to the hospital, and also asked for our doula to head over. He got me out
of the tub, but with my contractions coming back to back- there was no relief and I could not move. At
about 4:50, as I was kneeling in front of the toilet, I felt a gush. My water
had broken. I knew things were getting real. I was terrified, in agony, and had
no idea how I would make the 10 minute car ride to the hospital. I was feeling
out of control and overwhelmed. For the next five (I think, there is no way to
tell this time frame as all texts stopped) I was in excruciating pain. My
contractions were relentless.
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| Free to go home from the hospital |
Then, it happened. I felt something drop and my pain decreased.
I put my hand down and felt my baby’s head starting to come. I was holding my
baby inside of me and about to deliver
my baby in our downstairs bathroom with no medical assistance. Paul did not
believe me and I told him as calmly as I could, “Paul, I am holding our baby in
with my hand and I need you to call 911 now.” He still did not believe me and
asked if I was sure, and I said yes. There was no mistaking what was going on. He
cautiously called 911 (I think to appease me) and told them that his wife was
in labor and felt she couldn’t make it to the hospital.
The next thing I know, another contraction came and I was
lowering our baby to the bathmat below me. I looked with shock at the most
beautiful baby I had ever seen. I was relieved that she was pink and screaming and
could not overlook the massive amount of black hair on her head. My sweet
Gwendolyn was here. I wrapped our baby in towels and held her against me while Paul rushed
around the house looking for a shoelace as he was ordered to do by the 911
operator. I was relieved that labor was over, but absolutely terrified at the
same time. Were my baby and I ok?
The rest of the story is a bit of a blur. Within a few
minutes (I think) of delivery, our doula arrived followed by the EMT’s. I was
carried on a stretcher and rode in an ambulance to the hospital. Both Gwen and
I checked out healthy (though I opted for a blood transfusion) and, we were the talk of Labor and Delivery.
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Though our birth story is something I never in a million
years would have pictured for us, I can honestly say that I have never been
more proud of myself, or my husband and our relationship. Paul was amazing for
my labor, delivery, and is continuing to step up every day as the best daddy I
know. I am also proud of myself and my body. I had a less than three hour
labor that went from 0 to 60 in the blink of an eye, and held it together in a terrifying situation. I know that this
experience has brought us together in a way I never thought possible. Our little Gwen is
now five days old, and I am still going over her birth in my head. It was crazy
and insane, but I can honestly say I wouldn’t want her story any other way.
